The deal

Leonard was disturbed from his important perusal of Essential Gadgets Just For Men by a strange sound.

Leonora was making totally incomprensible noises on the sofa. She didn't sound very happy though.

Just as well I can't understand, thought Leonard. She's probably cursing me for making her play Risk. And he returned to Essential Gadgets, wondering if he could really justify another GPS to Mrs Leonard. I have it, I can say it is for Leonora while she is here. He limped over to the computer to start searching for the cheapest possible seller on the internet.

Leonora woke up with a start and a very muzzy head after her horrible nightmare.

Leonard turned round and told her he was ordering a GPS so that she would have one of her own to use while she was staying with them.

He thought she would be very pleased at his generous and thoughtful gesture. Obviously as he was paying for it she wouldn't be able to take it away. And it might come in useful for other guests too. Actually that was silly. The trick was to let Leonora use the old one, while he took the new one, especially as he needed to get used to the new features.

"Shut up about stupid GPS and geocaching. I'm not interested," she said most ungraciously.

Leonard looked very disappointed.

"Aw Leonora, I thought you would be pleased," he said sadly.

"I've just had a horrid nightmare about geocaching and armies so it's all your fault."

Leonard burst out laughing, he really couldn't help it.

"What a stupid dream Leonora. Only you would dream about geocaching and Risk together. What happened?"

She glared at him, but decided to tell him anyway.

"I was out caching on my own - which is highly unlikely as you can imagine - and just as I was about to find something, you sent your armies in to capture me, so you got to the cache, and it was a First To Find too."

At this point Leonard was laughing so much he thought he was going to choke. Tata and the little crutches sniggered too.

"I don't see why that was such a bad nightmare. Admittedly it would be disappointing not to get the First To Find, but it's hardly the end of the world," he eventually managed to say. Although he was always gutted when he just missed them.

"It wasn't funny. I was terrified of your armies. They were fierce and frightening and I thought they were going to kill me. They accused me of being a spy because I was pretending I didn't like geocaching but all the time I was trying to find the locations for your competitors so they could increase their numbers," babbled Leonora.

Leonard looked at her totally bemused. "I don't know what it says about your state of mind," he said.

"I do. It says no more Risk today," she said firmly.

"Are you making this dream up?" he asked.

"No, and I don't want to go geocaching again either, so you can forget ordering a new GPS unit and using me as an excuse."

"I'll do you a deal," he said quickly, desperate on seeing his reason for justifying the new GPS going up in smoke.

"I don't do deals," she said. "What is it?"

"No more Risk, as long as you let me go along with ordering the GPS on your behalf, so that Mrs Leonard doesn't complain at me." It was a risky suggestion but he thought this might appeal to Leonora's conspiratorial nature.

"No more Risk, OK you can order it - but as a surprise so it doesn't tie me into going caching, and you find a different game for us to play. And not anything involving dice. I don't think I like dice games. I certainly don't like war games," she said.

"Draughts, scrabble, dominoes or cards. And if you can't find any of them in the house, you can buy some. Or I'll buy them in fact." Leonora laid down her terms, pleased with herself that she had come back with a good counter-proposal.

She knew Leonard's weakness for gadgets, he would get to order the new GPS unit, and she would get to beat him at whatever game they ended up playing. And if he couldn't find any of the prescribed games in the house, her offer to buy something meant it wouldn't cost him anything. Irresistible, she thought.

"OK, I can live with that. But whatever game we play, we play for money," he added.

Now, much as Leonora liked playing the games she had mentioned, she did not like playing for money. It added a totally different dimension. And if she did not like losing games, she certainly didn't like losing money. Neither did Leonard but it was worth the risk that she would refuse so he could get his next point in.

"That's gambling. I don't gamble," she said.

"I think it is called playing for stakes," he said.

"That's what I said. Gambling." Leonora was getting sulky. She wasn't that confident of winning that she was prepared to put money on a game.

"How about strip poker then?" he said, with a straight face.

"I don't think that is funny at all."

"All right then. If you aren't willing to play for money, or .. play strip poker, I'll do you a different deal. When the new unit comes, and you are able to move about a bit more, you come caching with us at least once to justify me ordering it."

"Maybe," she said grudgingly, thinking she could probably get out of it later.

"No, not maybe, Leonora. You aren't going to get out of it later. Say 'Yes, Leonard, I agree.'"

There was a long silence. Well, it felt long to Leonard, wondering if he had pushed it too far.

"I agree," she finally said.

"I'll go and make us both a cup of tea, camomile of course for you," he offered generously.

"I really can't manage more than one cup of camomile tea a day. Just get me a glass of wine, oh, and I'll have a sandwich as well. Please."

That should annoy Leonard, she thought viciously. He was so prudish and boring that he certainly wouldn't approve of her drinking a glass of wine in the morning, and he would dislike her treating him as a waiter. She settled back on the sofa, pleased with her little self again.

"I'm not sure we've got any wine Leonora," he said, laughing to himself as he limped off into the kitchen.