'Phone calls

Leonora was feeling super-organised. She had got over her silly blip of buying nothing at the supermarket and was starting to plan her European trip. Planning was always good for the soul.

Pring pring. Pring pring. Leonora glared at the 'phone. She picked it up anyway. "Hello," she snapped.

"Hi Leonora, how's things?"

Leonora nearly dropped the 'phone. She had been so busy concentrating on horrid Leonard that she forgot other people occasionally rang her.

"Hello Paul," she answered. "Er, mixed really, how are you?" She tried to recover her composure. Paul was a casual fling now and again who was okayish in an unmeaningful sort of way.

"I'm round your way next week, I thought it would be good to meet up and go out for dinner, if you would like," he said.

"Oh yes, that would be nice," she replied. Thinking, selfish git, you asked how I am and never noticed when I said 'mixed really.' Typical man. Actually I don't give a toss about going out to dinner with you. Why have I just said yes?

"Hey that's great, I'm not sure of the days yet, but I'll ring you as soon as I know and we can confirm later. Be great to see you again," he said.

Blah blah boring blah, she thought. "Yeah super," she replied. "Speak to you then. Thanks for the call. Look forward to seeing you."

She put the 'phone down and scowled. The little crutches looked apprehensively at her.

Leonora laughed, and the little crutches sighed with relief.

"I don't want to see Paul," she explained. "Why the hell did I say yes?"

"Never mind Leonora," said one little crutch. "You have all week to get out of it," said the other one.

She beamed at them both. "Darlings, what would I do without you?"

The little crutches preened themselves, impressed with their valuable advice.

Pring pring. Pring pring. Leonora did NOT want to speak to Paul again. For one thing she hadn't worked out her excuse. Shit.

"Hi, listen....."

"Hello Leonora."

It wasn't Paul. Why was life so difficult? Why did Paul ring and she thought he was going to be Leonard?

And why was Leonard ringing when she was expecting Paul back again?

"Hello Leonard," she replied.

The little crutches gave her a sympathetic smile.

"I've got a card here for you to attend outpatients at our local hospital next week, so I thought you might like to make your travel arrangements," he said.

Leonora furrowed her brow. Heavily.

"Leonard, I thought I had told you I had transferred all the records to my local hospital so I don't need to traipse down to your place yet again.

"Give me the number of the outpatient department and I can ring them and tell them I don't need to go," she said.

"I've rung them," he said. "They have no record of any transfer and everything is still at our hospital. Just stop arguing Leonora, and turn up before Thursday.

"Let me know what day you are coming and what time, and I'll try and get to the station to pick you up. Bye." And Leonard hung up.

Leonora gazed at the 'phone in shock. Leonard had just hung up on her! Not only had he bossed her around and told her what to do, he had cut her dead. She hadn't even had chance to argue.

"Leonora," piped up one of the little crutches hesitantly.

"Yes dear," she turned and smiled kindly at it. "What is it?"

"If we go down to see Leonard, you can avoid Paul," said the little crutch, not really sure who Leonora liked least.

"True," said Leonora thoughtfully.

"And you don't have to worry about being rude to Leonard or speaking to him or anything," said the other little crutch.

"Whereas you would probably have to be polite and sociable with this Paul chap," added the first one.

"I haven't seen Paul for a while though," said Leonora, hesitating between the two appalling choices.

"Of course," said the second little crutch, "you could tell Leonard you are seeing Paul, and Paul that you are seeing Leonard."

Leonora burst out laughing, delighted with the little crutch's cunning idea.

"Indeed I could do that, it is an excellent idea," she said.

The little crutches jumped up and down gleefully and nearly fell over.

"Hey, watch it," said Leonora. "You will be in casualty next. Oh, and that's the only problem. I can easily avoid the two men, but I do need to go to hospital."

The little crutches stopped jumping up and down. Leonora and the little crutches looked at each other.

"Leonora," the little crutches both said together.

"Yes, I know," she said. "And at least you can get to tell the other little crutches about your adventures with me.

"When shall we go then? The weekend, beginning of the week?"

"Well," said the first little crutch, "I think you need to be there by Wednesday at the latest. And ideally a day or two sooner."

"And if you want to avoid Paul," said the second little crutch, "travelling on Sunday or Monday means you can just totally get out of seeing him."

"I'll see what tickets are available then. Suppose I had better email Leonard. Certainly don't want to speak to him again. Not that I got chance to say much. Bossy git."

The little crutches sniggered. Leonora tapped away at her email.

...........................

Leonard noticed a new mail had come up.

"Hi Leonard.

"It was such a pain dealing with the wretched NHS on the 'phone last time and it was obviously a total waste of time, so I might as well come down to your place.

"Thanks for the offer as ever. I'm looking into tickets and I'll let you know when I have booked them.

"Bye,

"Leonora."

Leonard read the email. He typed a brief reply.

"OK Leonora, that's great. Just let me know when. Look forward to seeing you."

He pressed send. And smirked.